Growing Men

We had a family reunion last week for my brothers and sisters. There were so many men at the party. This only seems notable because I grew up in a world of girls. Our parents had eight children: six girls and two boys. Four girls were born during the first twelve years of their marriage. My two brothers were still in elementary school when I graduated from high school, so there wasn't much machismo in my life. (My dad was very manly, but he was definitely outnumbered.) It was more balanced for the second phase of their childrearing, as the next four born were a boy, then a girl, then a boy, and last, another girl. They were known as The Little Kids.

I'm number three of the first four (aka: The Big Kids) and we girls got married within a few years of each other and managed to give birth to ten boys!! We had some girls, too, in that first batch of grandchildren, but seriously, it was grandson, grandson, grandson for several years. These boys have grown into men, and at the reunion I was just impressed at all the men there. We original children all married and produced 18 boys and 11 girls. This generation has reached adulthood, (the final one graduated from high school this spring...) and many of them are married, and lots of this generation came to our party. So there was a crowd of young and not so young men there.

I was reflecting on this today in Sacrament meeting as I watched the young men in our ward pass the Sacrament out to the congregation. Since I play the organ and my back is to that table, I didn't see who had set it up and was sitting there waiting to prepare the bread and water as the people sang the song. I finished playing, slid off the bench into my seat and immediately closed my eyes. As the person started praying, I realized that I didn't recognize the voice. When he finished the prayer, I looked up and two of the "boys" standing there passing out trays to the deacons were actually men who have joined the Church in the last few years in our congregation. For one of them, it was the first time I've seen him participate in this capacity. It was really great to see them, standing there with their third partner, a seventeen-year old young man. I thought how fine it is to be part of an organization where these men can make such a big change in their lives, even in middle age (as one of them is) and then become part of a peer group where it is irrelevant when you got the Aaronic priesthood---12 years old or 45 years old---because you have the same authority and opportunities for service and growth.

Now, what does that have to do with my family reunion? Well, as a girl, growing up in my house-o-girls, we did all the chores. We did the outside work, we did the inside work. I'm pretty sure my little brothers learned to make their beds, and probably did some dishes, as well as feed calves and haul hay. But, I really didn't understand boys well until I got married, became a mom, and started raising boys. GoolGuy taught me about the life of boys, and I read a lot of books. But, I learned to really appreciate the Church because it gave me a resource where other men could be involved in the lives of my boys and back up our parental ideals. It was also a place where, just when boys recognize that they aren't little kids anymore, and maybe they want their mothers to just back off a little, these boys are gathered up into an organization that gives them authority and purpose backed up with spirituality. Twelve year old boys really need the priesthood right then.

Yes, yes, family reunion....I loved seeing that my girl-centric childhood has blossomed into such a great bunch of men. Our dad died when the oldest of these little grandsons was only eight, so Daddy missed seeing the legions of missionaries, (and a granddaughter served, too). But he would have loved it on Saturday, watching the softball game with in-laws and cousins and men and women and children out there competing. He'd have loved the way a group of our grown sons unhesitatingly donned gloves and helped an uncle go haul a big load of hay out of a field and bring it home, stacked neatly on his trailer. He'd have smiled at dads hauling babies around, lifting them onto the swings, bravely riding behind a 10 year driver on the four-wheeler, holding onto the little ones as they rode the horses plodding around and around the pasture. It was a pleasure to see how our parents' love story has resulted in this crowd of really fine adults in our "Third Crop."

I also know that we all got help from the Priesthood organization at church in raising these fine men. We all had help from our dear farmer brother who willingly took on a 14/15 year old "hired hand" each summer from the ranks of the nephews. We all got help from other people who also raised great men to marry the granddaughters in our family and start new generations for us to love and enjoy. My experience in teaching boys all these years has made me appreciate the genius of the Priesthood. Right when a young boy starts to see himself as growing into manhood, he is invited into a group where he can have some authority, some structure, some teaching, some fun, some opportunity to serve others. There are other men who can back up his parents and provide an example of goodness (manly goodness) right when a boy needs it. Like I said, it's a genius plan...