Discretion is the Better Part of Valor

As you know, I am a member of the self-appointed International Grammar Police. And I have occasionally actually corrected signs that I have come across in stores, and places. However, I've had two experiences lately that I think will show that, not only do I have good grammar skills, but I also have common sense.


There is a property I pass on my way up to the temple near my house. I say property because it is a large lot surrounded by a wall that contains a house, several outbuildings, pieces of construction machinery and a travel trailer. It is a typical of other lots in this part of town, in that it was here a long time before this area became heavily populated and is still zoned for horses and so is larger than a common house plat. But, the wall has three signs posted along its perimeter, all saying the same thing:

Your on video, stupid.

Beneath the words is a drawing of a large pistol, pointed out toward the reader. It is meant as a deterrent to one who might be considering climbing over the wall and burglarizing the home. It is all I can do to resist returning to this block with a large Sharpie marker and correcting the "your" to a "you're". But I do resist. Because I am on video, duh. And I do not wish to be shot.

Yesterday, I drove for several blocks next to a pickup truck that had something posted on the rear window, using those vinyl letters and cutouts you can get made. There was Tinkerbell with her little fairy wings taking up one side of the window and these words on the other side: (big words)

If your going to ride my a$$,

at least pull my hair.

She also had her driver's side window down, so she could hang her cigarette out and tap off the ash. And I pulled up along side of her at three different lights. But, I did not suggest a correction of the misused "your" because I didn't wish to be told where to put my correction and how far.

So, even though I am an official language enforcement officer, I understand the limits of my voluntary service and so I live to correct on another day.